Are you protecting a life you are not living?
SARAH farrell 
A vulnerable share around getting to the root cause of suffering so that you can live free of the mental constructs that once kept you safe
What has begun to dissolve, shift and transform for you since the 9:9 portal opened?
I too have felt the urgency of these unsettling times.
I have been demanding MORE
a correction, an upgrade to my internal operating systems.....
and God/Universe/Divine delivered in miraculous, uncomfortable ways for me.
On the evening of 9/9, under that full blood moon,
a very gifted guide worked on, with and through me.
My body shook uncontrollably and tears poured down my face
— something I’ve experienced before through years of somatic work.
But this was different.
My nervous system has built the capacity to hold more space,
to release more unresolved trauma.
My bodymind felt safe enough with this man to go deeper.
What once felt impossible to access was named and began to dissolve.
What once felt like it would kill me, cannot.
Since that evening, my body has been tender,
unwinding decades of hypervigilance.
On the train on the way back from the event,
the gunshot sound of train brakes
— which usually had me jump out of my skin.....
This time, there was no startle. No panic. No threat.
This time, only awareness.
"Oh, it's just the train braking against the metal tracks.
I am still alive. I am safe."
It may sound so silly but for me,
for my body, that has been in a hyper vigilant state
of survival for so long
this was a holy shift
a turning point
- it's life changing
- life giving.
It's freedom from the mental prison of I AM not safe.
That’s what it feels like when the old story begins to dissolve.
My Origin Prison
From my earliest years, the story I was telling myself was:
“I can’t sleep, I have to stay alert, no one is coming to save me.”
My history gave me the visible “proof”
— everything I loved, I lost.
My nervous system believed the lie that:
- It’s dangerous to rest.
- It’s dangerous to succeed.
- It’s dangerous to have wealth or things of value.
For years, I made myself wrong for this survival pattern.
I’d ask: What’s wrong with me?
Why do I begin things with such brilliance, spark ideas that inspire,
and then destroy or move on to something else
— just before the big money and success comes in fully?
I'd watch others pick up and speak to what I had created 5, 10, 15 years earlier
and wonder why......
This is a Vulnerable share
because in spite of my past,
what has happened to me,
especially the unconscious choices and karma -
I have love,
I have had varying degrees of success,
I have made millions and I have lost everything.
People, homes and possessions.
The honest truth is:
you can’t see your blindspots
when you’re living inside them.
And you can’t create true freedom or greatness
when you’re frozen in survival.
The Struggle Bus
I know my nervous system was doing its best to protect me.
Doing it's best with what it knew at the time to keep me safe
… and stuck on the struggle bus.
For me, being visible, successful, abundant wasn’t just dangerous.
It felt life-threatening.
And deep down it was killing me.
And so many women I work with carry their own version of this story.
On the outside: successful, beautiful, confident.
On the inside: slowly dying inside, cut off from joy.
The common thread of “it’s not safe” becomes “I am not safe”
— and our bodies do the protecting.
What we think, we become....
Cancer. Fibromyalgia. Brain tumors.Chronic fatigue.
Mystery illness.
All physical diseases created from the silent vow:
“I’ll decide how I die before someone else kills me, hurts me, or betrays me.”
How many ways are you protecting a life, you are not living?
The Breakthrough
On 9/9, I finally, viscerally felt the relief
of letting go of the BIG lie at the root.
For the first time, I truly landed in the truth
of I AM safe.
To rest, to succeed, to be seen.
Now I know: I am free.
Free to dream big.
Free to create.
free to complete
Free to be abundant.
Free to make mistakes.
Free to shine.
And I am excited for how much greater I can show up and serve,
now that I am no longer bound by the lie that it isn’t safe.
Place your hands over your heart.
Breathe slowly. Feel the rhythm of your chest rising and falling.
Whisper to yourself:
“I am free.”
- Free to choose.
- Free to create.
- Free to rest.
- Free to make mistakes.
- Free to be seen.
- Free to live as love embodied.
I am free.
I am safe.
I am whole.
I am enough.
Every so often, life places us at a turning point.
A moment when the ordinary becomes a spiritual movement
of grace, faith and loving compassion.
This eclipse season and helpers arrive to support and guide us
into the next version of whom we came here to be
Shadow and light crossing paths.
Balance at its most exact.
A rare alignment in the heavens calling us into rare alignment within.
This eclipse is the doorway.
The practice is the path.
And freedom — is yours to live.
if you are ready to break the cycle of NOT being all of you
Book a FREE https://calendly.com/sarahjane...
I am deeply grateful for having the opportunity to receive support
from this incredible man
and to pay it forward.
I would be honored to be that certainty and safety for you.
If you are struggling and need some help,
please reach out to me here.
Love and gratitude always
Sarah-Jane
PS: Curious to know who my heaven sent guide is? I will be sharing more as I integrate
this deep and profound healing over the coming weeks.
Categories: : business success coaching, claim your power, cycle breakers, nervous system health, trauma informed coaching